Friday, September 27, 2013

Be patient husbands and wives!

Question : What is the ruling of the one who has good relations with the people (outside) but is of bad character in his home, easily angered? May Allah reward you with goodness.

imageAnswer: What is compulsory on a woman and what we advice her with is to be good to her husband, because he faces many problems, unbelievable problems. Yes, by Allah! He faces the problems of sustenance, problems of liabilities and other problems. So, it is incumbent on her if he enters upon her, she should be good to him. She should emulate Khadeejah radiallaahu anha when the Prophet sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam came to her and complained to her, “I fear that something would happen to me,” and she said to him, “Nay by Allah! Allah will never disgrace you, you keep good relations with your kin, you help all,” and she mentioned something of the character of the Prophet sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam and I advise the righteous woman to be good to her husband.

There are problems that the husband is faced with outside the home, perhaps she (the wife) is not aware of them, but if he faces problems from the wife also and she is a bad housemate, then by Allah, it is a very, very bad situation.

Despite all these, we advise the man to be patient, if the woman is chaste but of bad character, we advise him to be patient, and if he is able let him marry another wife, so she (the second wife) would calm her (the first) down, and what the first wife does not know, she does read nor write, and the second one can read and write. So, the first one can take her notebook and go and learn the writing and reading. And if it is the case (that he is alone), then he must calm her down alone and Allah’s aid is sought.

Source: “Last Journey of Imam Muqbil Ibn Hadee Al-Wadee” By His wife, Umm Salamah As.Salafiyah

Translated by brother Abu Humairah

Slight editing by Nasrin As.Salafiyah


Thursday, September 26, 2013

Guidelines for the Husband in Interacting with His Wife

The family is that brick which forms the foundation of a society. It is composed of individuals that have permanent relations established between them. Most importantly, it possesses almost a majority of the different kinds of personal relations.

imageBecause of this, there must be certain etiquettes placed in order to control and regulate these relations. This is such that it can be maintained in the best possible manner, and so that it can generate and produce its proper fruits. Family relations consist of the relationship between the spouses from one perspective, the relationship between the parents and the children from a second perspective, and the relationship between the children themselves from a third perspective.

Etiquettes of the Husband:

1. It is not from the deficiencies, but rather from good manners, that the husband shares in the responsibility of specified matters, such as the mending of garments or what is similar to that.

2. It is appropriate for a man to not restrict himself from serving himself. This is since the wife takes care of the household affairs. So therefore, it is from good manners that the husband extend a helping hand to his wife in the house, during times of necessity, such as when she is sick, pregnant, has given birth or similar to that.

3. The exemplary husband is he who cooperates with his wife by bearing good relations and showing kind manners (to her), according to the full extent of the meaning contained in these (last) two expressions. Truly, the husbands who are best at working alongside their wives are the best of mankind in the view of Islam. This good way of living between the spouses must be deeply imbedded into the daily marital life, even at the time of divorce.

4. Beware of characterizing the relationship between the spouses with over-seriousness! For indeed characterizing the family life with a militaristic nature amounts to one of the causes for failure and bad results.

5. From the kind and noble manners of the husband is that he complies and assents to the requests of his wife, so long as they are not forbidden in the Religion. And being luxurious in food, drink and clothing is at the entrance of matters forbidden in the Religion.

6. The husband should specify a time in which he can play around and pass free time with his wife.

7. The relationship between the spouses must contain one singular and specific nature. And it cannot be this way unless the couple begins demolishing all the obstacles and impediments that stand between them. For example, the husband should not feel timid and restrain himself from drinking out of the same cup that his wife drinks out of.

8. There is no human being that is perfect. So there is no doubt that the husband will see things in his wife that do not comply with his natural disposition and preferences. If these aspects are not in opposition to the fundamentals of the Religion or to the obedience of the husband and his rights, then at that point, he should not try to change her personality so that it complies with his natural preference.

9. And he must always remember that for each member of the couple, there will be an aspect of one’s personality that conflicts with the other’s personality. And he should also remember that if there are some characteristics that he does not find pleasing in his wife, then indeed she has other characteristics, which will definitely be pleasing to him.

10. Do not let Ramadaan be a barrier that impedes you from showing affection to your wife, such as by kissing her. But this is so long as you are able to refrain yourself, since what is forbidden during the days of Ramadaan is only sexual intercourse.

11. Do not chase after the errors of your wife and recount them to her, for too much blaming and reprimanding will worsen the relationship between the two of you, and it will pose a threat to your marital life. So overlook your wife’s easy ability to make mistakes, and make her falling into them seem like something small.

12. If you are able, do not hold back from providing your wife with good clothing and food, and from being generous in spending money on her. This is of course according to the extent of your ability.

13. Do not give little importance to implementing the punishment required for any acts in opposition to the Religion, which your wife has committed, whether it is in the home or outside it. This should be the main reason that causes you to become angry, thus no other reason should affect you (besides this one).

14. What has been stated previously does not mean that you should leave matters alone until that result comes to happen. Thus, whenever you realize that a matter is left alone, weigh it with seriousness and determination, without being too harsh or rude about it.

15. The woman is the head of the household, the one responsible for it. So do not attempt to meddle into affairs that do not fall into your area of duties and responsibilities, such as the food and the order of the house.

16. Beware of scolding your wife or blaming her for a mistake she committed, in the presence of others, even if they are your own children. For indeed that is an act that goes against correct behavior and it will lead to raising anger in the hearts of people.

17. If you are forced to place punishment upon your wife, then let it be by staying away from her at bedtime. And do not boycott her except that it is done within the household. And avoid using foul language, insulting her, beating her and describing her with repulsive names. For these matters do not befit an exemplary husband.

18. Having jealousy and caring about the modesty of your wife is a praiseworthy thing, which shows your love for her. However, it is on the condition that you do not go to great extremes in this jealousy. For then at that point, it would turn into something worthy of no praise.

19. Entering the house: Do not alarm your family by entering upon them suddenly. Rather, enter while they are aware of it, and greet them with Salaam. And ask about them and how they are doing. And do not forget to remember Allah, the Mighty and Sublime, when you enter the house.

20. Beware of spreading any secrets connected with the intimate encounters you have with your wife, for that is something restricted and forbidden.

21. Constantly maintain the cleaning of your mouth and the freshening of your breath.

22. Guardianship of your wife does not mean that you can exploit what Allah has bestowed upon you from taking charge of her, such that you harm and oppress her.

23. Showing respect and kindness to your wife’s family is showing respect and kindness to her. And this applies even after her death, on the condition that it is not accompanied by an act forbidden in the Religion, such as intermingling of the sexes or being in privacy (with them).

24. Too much joking will lead to (your family having) little fear (of disobeying you) and a lack of respect for you. So do not joke too much with your wife.

25. Be considerate that fulfilling the conditions which you promised to your wife during the pre-marriage agreement is a matter possessing the highest of importance and priority. So do not neglect that after getting married.

26. When you lecture your wife or reprimand her or simply speak to her, choose the kindest and nicest of words and expressions for your speech. And do not reprimand her in front of others or in front of your children.

27. It is not proper for you to ask your wife to look for work outside of the house or to spend upon you from her wealth.

28. Do not overburden your wife with acts that she is not able to handle. Consider, with extreme regard, the environment she was raised up in. Rural service is not like urban service, and the service of a strong woman and her preparation for it is not like the service of a weak woman.

29. There is nothing in the obligation of a woman’s service to her husband that negates his assisting her in that regard, if he should find the free time. Rather, this is from the good manners of living between the spouses.

Author: Dr. Marwwan Al-Qaisee

Source: Al-Asaalah Magazine

Produced by:


A Gadget free generation

There was a time when family, relatives and friends used to meet each other and remind each other of adhering to the Deen of Allaah. There was a time when at least family members used to sit and talk to each other and smile with each other and share the experiences of their lives. There was a time when people used to carry out long distances just to say salaam to their loved one’s. There was a time, it was.

imageNowadays its just a WhatsApp message away. Hardly people come to meet each other when someone is dead. This is not funny anymore! Most of the “Muslim” children meet their parents on ‘Hangouts’ or on ‘Skype’, no more physical meeting! So much so that when Muslims read the ahaadeeth books, they just flip over pages as if it reached to them through WhatsApp messages or by emails, they don’t comprehend that scholars have travelled miles and miles away on camels and horses just to get a hadeeth of the Prophet from a trustworthy Muslim not from just any Muslim.

Technology brought many useful and beneficial things, with so many bad things with it. The biggest reason for unemployment is because of the advancement in the technology when machines won the race against men.

History bears witness that all the biggest tragedies that has happened immerged because of the human actions. Technology is not a disaster, but its a two edged knife. We grabbed the knife and used the other end to stab people. As Allaah said (tafseer), the poison of fasaad which you see in land and in sea is because of the human handy action.

Children and especially the youth are engaged and busy with their gagets 24X7 which their parents brought them as a gift. It’s not a gift O parents, these are time wasting devices and they are wasting lives of your children. They take them away from the Deen of Allaah and they take them away from the real life and parents. Unless and until you are done with their tarbiyah and they are concrete, don’t bring them gagets, its like you are inviting trouble!


A Warning Against the Spread of the Deen of the Rawafidh (Shia)

Indeed that which brings great sadness is that the destructive math-hab of the Rawafidh has been given scope and many opportunities to spread in the region of the Arab Muslim lands. It has actually become intensely widespread and those behind its propagation are the Rulers of the Iranian Persian lands, Ayaat of Iran and the Mullahs who are the enemies of Islam, of The Truth, of Tawheed and its people. They exert themselves with everything that is precious and of value in disseminating this math-hab which is accompanied with harsh zeal and a frightening plot to seize all the Muslim lands.

imageThey do this with their destructive math-hab which is established on:

- Making Takfeer (declaring to be non-Muslims) of the Companions of Muhammad – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam.

- Rejecting the Sunnah of Muhammad – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam – because it has come via the truthful and faithful Companions of Muhammad – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam.

- Distorting the Qur’an and applying texts regarding the Kuffaar and Munaafiqoon (hypocrites) to the Companions of Muhammad – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam.

- Further applying texts, which mention the threat of the Hellfire to the Companions of Muhammad – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam – especially to Abu Bakr and Umar – radiallaahu anhuma.

- Applying the Ayaat (verses) of praise and the promise of Allah exclusively to themselves and the Family of the Prophet -sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam. However, Allah has freed the family of the Prophet – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam – from the extremist math-hab of the Rawafidh and their principles of disbelief which are founded upon this disbelief.

From their deviance is that they apply the Ayaat (verses) of the Tawheed of Allah which indicate worshipping Him alone – such as the saying of Allah:

<<And Allah has said: Do not take for yourselves two deities. He is but one God>> [an-Nahl: 51] – to their Imams!

How much have they distorted the texts of the Qur’an? Whoever wishes to know the reality of their religion should read their fundamental sources such as ‘al-Kafi’ by Kullayni, Tafseer al-Qummi and Tafseer al-‘Ayaashi, which has even exceeded the Jews and the Christians in terms of distortion!

From what fills the heart with grief is that this deviant, destructive math-hab has begun to be disseminated in Algeria. Indeed we have read and heard that a large number of these people have embraced the ‘Aqeedah of Rafdh (Shia). A number of them study in the Rafidhi city called Qum, though there has been opposition to this from the government and from some of the scholars, however it has been weak. Where is the required concern from them for Islam and Tawheed?!

And where is the concern for the Qur’an and the Sunnah? Where is the concern for the Companions of Muhammad – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam?!

O you Algerians – government and the people – indeed your remaining silent on the spread of this movement and its math-hab will – and I swear by Allah – have disastrous results in relation to your Deen, your worldly matters, your politics and your Hereafter when you meet your Lord because you remained silent about the greatest of evils and the greatest of dangers upon your Deen and your worldly matters.

I ask Allah to awaken the senses of the Muslims and their intellects in order to face this destructive danger. An imperative aspect of what they are facing is keeping away from their websites, which promote and spread evil and major deviancy.

A clarification of some of the Principles of the Rafidhah (Shia)

1. From their principles is making Takfeer of the Companions and to attack them. This is a type of destruction of Islam, which has never been known except to cause destruction. This is why they try to convey this Takfeer in the best way they can.

2. From their principles is that Imamate is from the fundamentals of the Deen, which is extremism from them. The fundamentals of the Deen were explained by the Messenger of Allah – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam – and Imaamate is not from them.

3. According to them, knowing the twelve Imams is from the fundamentals of the Deen and whoever is ignorant of the twelve Imams is regarded by them to be a Kaafir (disbeliever).

4. The Imams are, in their view, infallible (protected from sinning) and are protected from any neglect or forgetfulness. They favour them over the Prophets and Messengers – alayhim as-salaam.

5. They believe that their Imams know the Unseen and that they manage and control every single atom within the universe. This is from the greatest acts of disbelief as they have made their Imams associates with Allah regarding the knowledge of the Unseen and the control of the universe.

6. They falsely claim that the Messenger of Allah – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam – recommended that Ali – radiallaahu anhu – be the Khaleefah. They claim that the Companions illegally and forcefully took the Khilafah from him. This claim is the greatest of lies and it is the foundation of their misguidance and their tyranny against the Companions, their Takfeer of them and their cursing them.

7. From their superstitions and stories is that they have a Mahdi from the Prophet’s – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam – family whom they await and that he has been in a cave for more than 1200 years who they claim is the 12th Imam. This Imam does not exist, this Mahdi has not even been created. The Mahdi that the Messenger of Allah – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam – mentioned is true, however, he is not the one that the Rawafidh (Shia) claim is the Mahdi. From their stories is that Musa bin Jafar (d. 183AH) – who the Rawafidh claim is one of their Imams – said to a person during his time: ‘If you live then you will meet him.’ Since then, 1249 years have passed and they still have not met him. This is proof that this was a slander and a lie against Musa.

8. From their fundamental principles is having Eemaan (faith) that a person is brought back to life after having died and that, according to their Deen, whoever does not believe this is a Kaafir. Al-Aloosi said in ‘Mukhtasir at-Tuhfa al-Ithna Ashareeyah’ (pp200-201):

‘The Math-hab of Ahlus-Sunnah is that the dead do not return to the worldly life before the Day of Judgement. All of the Imaamiyyah (Shia) sect and some of the other sects of the Rawafidh (Shia) say that some of the dead will return.

They claim that the Prophet – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam – and the one that he bequeathed (meaning: Ali), the two generous ones (Hasan and Hussain) along with their enemies – by which they mean the three Khulafaa’, Mu’aawiyah, Yazeed, Haaroon, Ibn Ziyaad and their likes – and other Imams and their people who were killed will all be brought back to life after the Mahdi appears and they (i.e. the Prophet – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam -, Ali, and Hasan and Hussain) will punish everyone that oppressed their Imams and they will take revenge from them, before the arrival of the Dajjaal, then they will die awaiting resurrection on the Day of Judgement.’ May Allah fight the Rawafidhah.

9. From the foundations of their beliefs is their claim against the Companions that they distorted the Qur’an. Allah forbid that the Companions of the Messenger of Allah – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam – may Allah be pleased with them all – distorted even one word from the Book of Allah. Rather, those who distorted it are actually the Rawafidh. How many times have they distorted the wordings of the Qur’an and its meanings? Most of their distortion concerns the Ayaat of the promises of Allah and His warnings and Ayaat regarding the Kuffaar and Munaafiqoon, which they apply to the Companions of the Messenger of Alla ah – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam – whereas it is the Rawafidh who rightfully deserve that these Ayaat are applied to them.

10. From the greatest of their fundamentals is Tuqeeyyah (lying to cover up their falsehood). They regard it to be nine tenths of their Deen and that whoever does not have Tuqeeyah has no Deen. They ascribe this saying to Abu Jafar that he said: ‘Allah – Azza wa Jall – insisted for us and you to have Tuqeeyah.’ They also say that he said: ‘Tuqeeyah is from my religion and the religion of my fathers and whoever does not have Tuqeeyah has no Eemaan.’ [See al-Kafi by Kulaani 2/217-218]

11. From their religion is to build structures over graves, especially the graves of their Imams, and to perform Tawaaf around them and to seek aid from the inmates of the graves. They give huge amounts of money to them and take oaths and sacrifices at the doors to these structures. These are from the greatest types of Shirk.

12. From the important matters of their Deen is temporary marriage – which the Messenger of Allah – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam – only made a concession for when there was a need and it was a necessity. However, this was later abrogated by Allah on the tongue of the Messenger of Allah – sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam. From the narrators of the prohibition of temporary marriage was Ali – radiallaahu anhu – himself. The Shia made temporary marriage permissible and narrated so-called ‘narrations’ showing its virtue something which both the Shari’ah and the intellect reject. For example, their saying: ‘Whoever gratifies his pleasure with a believing woman then it is as though he visited the Ka’bah 70 times.’

They say: ‘Trustworthy narrators narrated from as-Saddiq – alayhis-salaam – saying, ‘Indeed temporary marriage is from my Deen and the Deen of my fathers. Whoever acts upon it then he has raised our Deen, whoever rejects it then he has rejected our Deen and has believed in other than our Deen.’

Temporary marriage in this form, according to them, is from their greatest fundamentals such that if one were to leave it, it would be regarded as Kufr (disbelief).

There are some narrations from them regarding this, from them is this:

‘Whoever performs temporary marriage once, then his rank will be like the rank of al-Hussain – alayhis-salaam . Whoever performs temporary marriage twice, then his rank will be like the rank of al-Hasan – alayhis-salaam . Whoever performs temporary marriage three times, then his rank will be like the rank of Ali – radiallaahu anhu. Whoever performs temporary marriage four times, then his rank is the like of my status.’

This statement of theirs ‘alayhis-salaam’ is from their expressions while, in reality, what should be said regarding the one who is a Companion is ‘radiallaahu anhu’ or ‘rahimahullaah’ for a Taabi’ee (the follower of the Companions) and those after them.

This is a brief insight into the Deen of the Rawafidh although their deviancy and disbelief fills up volumes of books.


The Rich Man

Short story:


A wise and pious rich man, sensing his approaching death, called his son to his side and gave him these instructions: "My son, I shall be leaving you very shortly. On the day when I die, and they have washed my body and come to wrap it in the shroud, I want you to put one of my socks on my foot. This is my final request of you."

Soon after this, the old man did indeed die, leaving behind his goods and property, his children and his dependents. Family, friends, acquaintances and neighbors attended his funeral. The body had been washed and was almost completely wrapped in the shroud, when the son remembered his father's wish. Finding one of his old socks, he handed it to the washer of the dead, saying, "In accordance with my father's last request, please put this sock on his foot."

"That is quite impossible,” said the man. "Such a thing is utterly impermissible in Islam. I cannot act against the Sacred Law." Despite this valid objection, the son insisted, "That was my father's final request; it must certainly be carried out."

The washer of the dead was unmoved. "If you won't take my word for it," he said, "go and ask the mufti. He will confirm what I tell you, that it is not permissible." Holding up the funeral, they consulted the mufti, preachers and scholars, all of whom declared that this was not permissible in Islam. Just then, an aged friend of the deceased interrupted the debate with these words to the son: "My boy, your late father entrusted me with a letter which I was to hand over to you after his departure. Here, this letter belongs to you." So saying, he gave him an envelope. Taken by surprise, the boy opened the envelope and read out the contents of his father's letter:

"My son, all this wealth and property I have left to you. Now you see: at the last moment, they won't even let you give me an old sock to wear. When you yourself come one day to be in my condition they will also refuse to let you keep anything but your shroud. Few yards of shroud are all you will be able to carry over from this fleeting world into the Hereafter. So pull yourself together and be prepared. Spend the fortune I have left you, not for the satisfaction of vain desires, but in ways pleasing to Allah, that you may achieve honor in both worlds." ........


Tuesday, September 24, 2013


Now before you read this article , You have to understand why the scholars or our salaf were so strict in forbidding innovation and considering innovation the mother of all dangers from this link :

To Know why Bid`ah (innovation) is the most dangerous thing ever , please click here :

How will you understand the dangers of Darkness until you read/learn about them? So go through the above link if you have no idea about Innovation.

Khuwayl, the brother in-law of Shu'bah binul-Hajjaaj said: "I was with Yoonus bin'Ubayd, so a man came and said : "O Abu 'Abdillah! You forbid us from gathering of 'Amr bin'Ubayd, and your son has gone to him?" He (Yoonus) said: "My son?!" He said: "Yes." So Yoonus became angry. So i didn't leave until his son came, so he said: "O my son! You knew the opinion of 'Amr bin'Ubayd, then you enter upon him?!" So he began to make excuses, so he said: " (But) So and so was with me!" So Yoonus said: " I prohibit fornication and stealing and drinking khamr (intoxicants), but for you to meet Allah Subahana wa ta'alaa with (all of) that is more beloved tom me than you meet with Him with the opinion of 'Amr bin'Ubayd and the companions of 'Amr-meaning the Qadariyyah. Sa'eed bin'Amr said: "We did not see any man who was better than him," meaning Yoonus (bin'Ubayd).

Note: 'Amr bin'Ubayd bin Baab al-Basree, al-Mutazilee, al-Qadaree from the heads of the Mutazilah and Qadariyyah and a caller to their innovated beliefs.

Ma'mar said: "ibn Taawoos was sitting, then a man from the Mu'tazilah cane and he began to speak." He (Ma'mar) said: "So Ibn Tawoos put two fingers in his ears." Hr (Ma'mar) said: " And he said to his son: 'O my son! Put your fingers in your ears! (Put them in) farther! Don't listen to anything from his speech!" Ma'mar said: " Meaning, verily the heart is weak."

Sharh Usool al-I'tiqaad of al-Laalikaa'ee (1/247)

It was said to Maalik bin Mighwal: "I saw your son playing with birds!" So he said: "How excellent that they distracted him from the companionship of an innovator."

Ash-Sharhu wal-Ibaanah if Ibn Battah (#90)

Artaah binul-Mundhir said: " That my son be a faasiq from the faasiq is more beloved to me than he be a person of desires (i.e innovation)."

Ash-Sharh wal-Ibaanah (#87)

Hammaad bin Zayd said: "Yoonus (bin'Ubayd) said to me:'O Hammaad!Indeed if I were to see a youth upon every evil condition, then I do not despair of his goodness until I see him accompany a person of bi'dah, for with that I know that he has been ruined."

Ash-Sharh wal-Ibaanah (#94)

Benefit: They way of Ahul-Sunnah is not to sit with listen to or debate with ahul bid'ah (the people of innovation) and to warn against them , as is clear in the books of the Salaf. And here we find the concern they had for the welfare of their children, and the youth, fearing for them and warning them from innovation and it's people in order to preserve and protect their religion. You find that in every Khutbah he would give, whether the Khutbah of Jumu'ah or for a wedding or other than that, the Messenger of Allah Sallallahu alayhi wa Sallam would raise his voice and his face would turn red and he would say, "The most evil of affairs are the newly invented affairs," but there was not one innovation! He repeated this over and over in every Khutbah to ingrain this belief into the hearts of His Companions. Therefore, it is obligatory upon us to believe that innovation (bid'ah) is the most evil of affairs and to instill this belief into our children as well. And there are many narrations that show the evil and the danger of innovation. For example, the Messenger of Allah Sallallahu alayhi wa Sallam said:

"There will be a people who these ahwaa' (innovations) will flow through them just like rabies flows through the one who has been bitten. So there will not remain any joint except that it (innovation) enters into it." (Kitaabus -Sunnah of Ibn Abee 'Aasim (#1) And He said: "Beware of the newly invented affairs for indeed every innovation is misguidance." (Kitaabus Sunnah(#31) Mu'aawiyyah narrated: "Indeed this Ummah will divide into 73 sects due to innovation, all of them in the fire except one, and it is the Jamaa'ah (the Companions)." (Kitaabus-Sunnah (#2) It is reported from Anas and Ibn 'Umar that the Prophet Sallallahu alayhi wa Sallam said: "Whoever desires other than my Sunnah then he is not from me." (Kitaabus-Sunnah (#61&62) He Sallallahu alayhi wa Sallam said: " Indeed I have left you upon clear guidance, it's night is like day in clarity. No one deviates from it after me except that he is destroyed." (Kitaabus-Sunnah (#48) And the narrations from the Prophet Sallallahu alayhi wa Sallam, his Companions and those who followed after them in this issue are many. Taken From The Book Teaching children Tawheed By Shaykhul-Islam Muhammad Bin'Abdul Wahhab (d206H)TEACHING THE CHILDREN ABOUT AQEEDAH AND HADEETH :Link :



  1. This Islamic ruling doesn’t apply because my reading of the past 200 year history of the Muslim world shows they didn’t apply it .

  2. This Islamic ruling doesn’t apply because all these pictures of Muslim scholars show they didn’t apply it .

  3. This Hadith is fabricated because I don’t like how it sounds based on my ethnocentric perspective of the world .

  4. 1100 years of Muslim scholars were all wrong, except for those 10 I managed to dig up because they fit my biased conclusions .

  5. I don’t differentiate b/w relative or absolute rational judgements. Hence, they’re all absolute & my Islam will be based on that .

  6. This Hadith doesn’t make sense to me because my limited knowledge of the world is actually unlimited. So I’ll reject it! .

  7. I’ve been studying Islam very intensely…through Google searches. So I’m an expert scholar now who can do Hadith criticism! .

  8. This scholar says things that fit well with my biased views for or against Islam. Finally, someone who speaks for true Islam! .

  9. This Hadith doesn’t fit with what scientists say. It’s decision time: leave Islam or reject science…no 3rd choice allowed! .

  10. Mastery of Arabic is not required to understand the Quran or Hadith, and can in fact be skipped altogether. .

  11. I only have enough time to study Arabic. But I’ll spend it investigating different Hadith narrations & their chains .

  12. I’m faced with a paradox. But I’ll treat it as a contradiction and disregard the whole thing so I don’t have to think about it. .

  13. I never studied Islamic creed or logic. So I’ll make everything I find perplexing in Islam a creedal or logical issue. .

  14. I’ve only been exposed to Islam based on how it’s applied within my culture. Hence, this is how Islam must be applied everywhere .

  15. I never heard of women scholars in Islam. Hence, they don’t exist! .

  16. I know Islam is transmitted through people all the way back to the Prophet PBUH. But I’ll ignore that & got at it alone! .

  17. I’m too impatient to sit with teachers of Sacred Knowledge. But I’ll pretend my impatience is really being too intelligent. .

  18. Islam didn’t come to rectify a culture. It came to completely wipe it out & exchange it for an Arab or Indian subcontinent one! .

  19. If I don’t comprehend the wisdom behind a ruling, I will not act upon it until further notice. .

  20. I will equivocate between using the intellect to understand the text and using the intellect to rule over the text. .

  21. I will pretend the Quran restricts submission to God by having understood the ruling & its wisdom before submitting. .

  22. I will create a conception of what understanding is based on my own criteria for it, then restrict my submission accordingly. .

  23. I will pretend I’m as intelligent as the most brilliant minds that came before me & my conclusions are equal in weight to theirs .

  24. I will claim my skepticism to be a form of humility so I don’t have to act upon & say what I truly believe. .

  25. I will pretend that my way of thinking as moulded by my secular education has not affected my view of Islam as a Muslim .

  26. I will confuse my arrogance for being a critical thinker in order to justify my inability to submit to a ruling. .

  27. I will not trouble myself with going through why scholars differed in opinions so I can pretend my conjectures are valid. .

  28. I will pretend that I don’t subconsciously think the West’s cornering of religion is also the answer for Muslims to improve .

  29. I will pretend that my thinking that my intellect is absolute & unlimited is not just a form of deifying myself. .

  30. I will exercise judgments over Islamic texts without getting any training over how they’re supposed to be approached. .

  31. I will pretend that when I read the Quran & Hadith, what I understood didn’t pass through my own intellect & hence is absolute. .

  32. I will make Islam all about legal rulings. .

  33. I will pretend that the only proper Muslims are those who I agree with and agree with me. The rest are in serious trouble. .

  34. I will pretend that when a shaykh talks, he’s transcendent & doesn’t have personal biases or limitations. .

  35. In science, the explanations of observations are exactly the same as the observations. .

  36. I will debate against people in subjects that I don’t understand. Then I’ll pretend my confusion is due to weakness in Islam. .

  37. I grew up in a Muslim household… So I know Islam. .

  38. I never went past first year biology. Hence, I’m qualified to debate against PhD holders in evolutionary biology. .

  39. I hardly recite the Quran outside of Ramadan. I’ll pretend that has nothing to do with my increasing doubts. .

  40. Trust me, I’m an engineer, and what you’re doing is BID’AH. .

  41. I will claim that the Earth doesn’t have enough resources while I take other people’s share of it. .

  42. I own A translation of the Quran and A translation of Bukhari. Bismillah, so what’s your question again? .

  43. I will pretend that Islam is a person who I speak on behalf of on all matters regardless of my lack of training. .

  44. Beard, check. Shorter garments, check. Kufi, check. Recitation, so so.. but check. Hadith, in English. Result = Scholar! .

  45. I will talk about Andalusia & the Golden Age of Islam for nostalgia, & Signs of the End of Time coming, all to escape my present .

  46. The only thing that matters for a Muslim woman is that she wears a hijab or a niqab. Nothing else matters…Nothing! .

  47. I will use people that seem to be exceptions to a trend who in reality were products of that trend, to refute there’s a trend .

  48. An argument that makes me laugh at the opposing side is a logical argument. .

  49. A universal truth can only be accessible by a few people who can do upper level theoretical mathematics. .

  50. Modern science is not built on premises from a philosophical platform that was set in place during the 18th and 19th centuries. .SOURCE :


Monday, September 23, 2013

Quran as a miracle

The Quran is truly a living miracle. Going deeper into it, one finds amazing characteristics from every perspective.

imageIn Language

The Arabs of the 6th and 7th centuries CE were masters of the Arabic language. Eloquence and rhetoric were their lifeblood. The liveliness that marked their gatherings, the gaiety of their fairs, and the virtues of which they boasted, all found expression through poetry and literature. They were so proud of their literary accomplishments that they disdainfully dubbed all the other peoples of the world as “’Ajam” or “Dumb.” It was in this atmosphere that there appeared on the scene an unlettered person, Muhammad sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ) . He presented before them an oration, and declared it to be the Word of Allaah, which claimed (what means):

“If mankind and the jinn were to gather together to produce the like of this Quran, they could never produce the like thereof, even if they backed up one another.” [Quran 17:88]

Such a proclamation was an amazing thing. It came from a person who had never learned anything from the renowned poets and scholars of the time, had never recited even a single piece of poetry in their congregations, and never attended the company of soothsayers. And far from composing any poetry himself, he did not even remember the verses of other poets. This proclamation, repeated several times in the Quran, was therefore the greatest challenge to their literary expertise, and at the same time a fatal stab at their polytheist creed and beliefs. Following this, a hush fell over the whole galaxy of these stirring orators and fiery poets. Not a soul stepped forward to accept the challenge of producing the like of the Quran. They persecuted the Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ) called him insane, a sorcerer, poet and soothsayer, but failed utterly in composing even a few sentences like the Quranic verses. To this day, the challenge has remained unmet, although throughout history and even in modern times, many people have made feeble attempts to do so.

In Prophecies

Among other things, the Quran contains prophecies of future events, many of which have come to pass. We reproduce here a discussion of one such prophecy, which was fulfilled within the lifetime of the Prophet Muhammad sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ).

While the Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ) was still in Makkah, after having been entrusted with prophethood, and was being subjected to all sorts of persecutions by the Makkan idolaters, exactly at the same time the two great powers of Rome and Persia were involved in repeated wars. The Romans were beaten, vanquished and suffered a great loss in men and material. At last, the Romans were so utterly exhausted that, far from being in a position to launch a counter-attack, they could not even take a firm stand anywhere. This situation was a matter of jubilation for the pagans of Arabia as they identified the Persians, being fire-worshippers, with themselves and the Romans, as “people of the Book,” with the Muslims. In their eyes, the dominance of the Persians, presaged their own victory and the defeat of the Muslims. It was under these circumstances that these initial verses of the chapter called Ar-Room (The Romans) were revealed (which mean):

“…The Romans have been defeated, in the land close by. And after (this) defeat of theirs, they will soon be victorious within a few years. To Allaah belongs the command before and after and on that day the Believers will rejoice in Allaah’s help…” [Quran 30:2-4]

For those who were aware of the military situation concerning the Romans and Persians, this prediction was absolutely incredible. In fact, the Persians kept marching forward until they reached the city walls of the Roman capital, Constantinople. The renowned historian Edward Gibbon has commented on this prediction thus:

“When this prophecy was made, no prediction could be more unbelievable because the initial twelve years of Heraclius were evidently declaring an end to the Roman Empire.” [Fall of the Roman Empire, v.5, p.73-74]

But exactly seven years after his first defeat, the Roman emperor sallied forth from the capital and inflicted crushing defeats on the Persians at several places, and after that the Roman armies were victorious everywhere.

Meanwhile, a large number of Muslims had migrated to Al-Madeenah and their wars with the idolaters of Makkah had already begun. The day on which 313 ill-equipped Muslims were decisively beating their enemy -- 1000 heavily armed Makkan warriors -- at the battlefield of Badr, came the news that the Romans had defeated the Persians. It was then realized that the Quranic verse, (which means): “…on that day the Believers will rejoice in Allaah’s help” [Quran 30: 4-5] was meant to denote the twin happiness of the Romans’ victory as well as their own victory at Badr.

In Science and History

Apart from prophecies, the Quran has pointed out many scientific and historical facts which were not only unknown at that time, but could not even be imagined given the development of civilization. Entire books have been written (by both Muslims and non-Muslims) confirming the correspondence of scientific discoveries to the truths expressed in the Quran. Again, we suffice here with two examples:

The Quran has stated that as Fir’awn (Pharaoh) was drowning in the sea he made a confession of faith orally, just to save his life. In response, Allaah Said (what means):

“What! Now? And indeed before this you did rebel and were of the corrupt. So this day We shall rescue you with your body that you may be a sign to those who come after you.” [Quran 10: 91-92]

At the time of revelation of this verse, and even centuries afterwards, nobody knew that the body of Fir’awn had been preserved, but it has been discovered only recently and is preserved in a museum at Cairo.

The Quran has stated (what means): “And of everything We have created pairs that you may take heed.” [Quran 51: 49]

When this verse was revealed, the general concept was that male and female pairs existed only among human beings and animals or in some vegetation. However, with the advancement of science, the Quranic reality is becoming manifest that male and female pairs exist in everything. In some instances they are termed as male and female, and elsewhere as positive and negative, as electron and proton, or neutron and positron. In another verse, the Quran has also clarified that the occurrence in pairs in many other things is still unknown to people. It says (what means):

“Glorified be He Who created pairs of all things which the earth grows, and of themselves (humans), and of that which they know not.” [Quran 36: 36]

A Miracle For Us!

Looking back through history, it has been observed that the prophets, may Allaah exalt their mention, were sent with miracles that reflected the society and knowledge of the people they were sent to. Thus, Moosaa (Moses) may Allaah exalt his mention was sent with a staff that truly turned into a snake, baffling the trickster magicians of the Pharaoh. ’Eesaa (Jesus) may Allaah exalt his mention was given the power to cure diseases and give life to the dead, astonishing the Jewish doctors who felt proud of their limited knowledge of healing, and who had begun to disregard and deny the supernatural powers of God.

Similarly, the Quran was an immediate miracle for the Arabs so many years ago, since it challenged and far surpassed the limits of their literary expression. Unlike the miracles of previous prophets, which were only applicable for a limited time, to this day the Quran -- the Final Testament given to the Last Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ) -- is still a relevant miracle for humanity and will remain so as long as the world exists. We live in an age of science and technology, of knowledge, logic, and reason. Yet, in spite of all the human advancement in every sphere of life, the principles of the Quran have not been proven wrong nor have they become “out-of-date.” This is really the great miracle of the Quran, it has proven itself a timeless, universal message for humankind, relevant to every facet of our life — be it politics, economics, ethics, science, literature, arts or entertainment. In fact, even non-Muslim scholars have admitted that the entire “Western” civilization today, thriving from the “rebirth of humanity” (i.e. the “Renaissance”), would not have been so, had it not been for the message brought by Muhammad sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ). As the celebrated English writer, Robert Briffault, says in The Making of Humanity:

“The ideas of freedom for all human beings, of human brotherhood, of the equality of all men before the law of democratic government, by consultation and universal suffrage, the ideas that inspired the French Revolution and the Declaration of Rights, that guided the framing of the American Constitution and inflamed the struggle for independence in the Latin-American countries were not inventions of the West. They find their ultimate inspiration and source in the Holy Quran. They are the quintessence of what the intelligentsia of medieval Europe acquired from Islam over a period of centuries through the various societies that developed in Europe in the wake of the Crusades in imitation of the brotherhood associations of Islam. It is highly probable that but for the Arabs, modern European civilization would never have arisen at all, it is absolutely certain that but for them, it would never have assumed that character which has enabled it to transcend all previous phases of evolution.”


Obstacles in the Path of Knowledge: Taking Knowledge From the Asaaghir


Do Not Become Accustomed to Comfort and Luxury

Shaykh Muhammad bin ‘Uthaymeen (may Allah have Mercy upon them both) said:

image“This is a piece of advice that should be given to both the student of knowledge and other than the student of knowledge. This is because indulging in these things contradicts the guidance of the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa salam), as he used to forbid excessive luxury, and would sometimes enjoin others to be barefoot. The person who becomes accustomed to comfort will find it difficult to face various situations, as he will face things that do not correspond to the luxury and comfort that he is used to.

Let us take an example, and it is the example we mentioned of the hadeeth enjoining occasionally being barefoot. Some of the people do not leave their feet bare at times. They always have to have socks, khuffs, or shoes, and you never find them walking much. Such a man, were you to suggest to him that he walk 500 meters without anything protecting his feet, you would find this to be extremely hard on him. His feet might even start bleeding from the harshness of the ground! However, if he makes himself accustomed to harsh conditions and avoids constant comfort, you would find that he would be blessed with much good.

If the body is not accustomed to such conditions, it will not have immunity to pain. So, you would find such a person feeling pain from anything, while if he possessed immunity, he would pay it no mind. This is why you find the hands of laborers to be much stronger and firmer than the hands of students of knowledge. There is nothing to deter or prevent a laborer from doing anything since his hands have become accustomed to these conditions. This is to the point that if you touch the hands of a laborer, it is as if you are touching a rock because of the roughness and harshness, and if he were to wrap his fingers around your hand, it would hurt a lot. This is due to his long hours handling mud and bricks, and because he has accustomed himself to this.

So, when a person accustoms himself to comfort and luxury, there is no doubt that this will harm him greatly…”

[‘Sharh Hilyat Talib al-‘Ilm’; p. 43]


The Muslim Home and Modern Technology

Faatimah and Ruqayyah are sisters. Faatimah is the elder one and is seven years older than her sister. Allaah The Exalted has granted her a sound mind and an eloquent tongue. Hence, her younger sister Ruqayyah discusses life’s affairs with her and asks for her opinion on issues or problems that she encounters or any of the various manifestations of contemporary life.

imageOne evening, they decided to buy a new iron, as the one that they had was broken. Because Faatimah was busy doing some housework, Ruqayyah went to buy the iron alone from a large store that sells household goods and electrical equipment.

When she returned, Ruqayyah said to Faatimah, “I managed to buy a new iron for a reasonable price, but something strange happened at the store.”

Faatimah asked, “What happened?”

Ruqayyah replied, “While I was buying the iron and checking the different types and prices, I unintentionally overheard an argument between a husband and his wife who were standing by my side and buying some electric equipment.

“The wife said to her husband, ‘I want to buy a new electric meat mincer to make cooking easier for me.’ Her husband objected saying, ‘Why do you want to buy it if you have the manual mincer that both of our mothers used to use. Besides, the minced meat that comes out of the manual mincer has a special taste that I like and I think that the electric mincer will not give the same taste. Moreover, you are a housewife and have enough time that would make it possible to use the manual mincer and you will not need to use the electric one that is used by working women because they do not have enough time. Thus, I totally refuse to buy this electric mincer.’ Here, the wife looked sad and distressed. She did not reply and walked on helplessly with her husband.”

Faatimah said, “Allaah The Exalted has granted man a mind and honored him among all creatures. Allaah The Almighty inspired man to use his mind in inventing useful things that would make life easier. In the course of progress, man invented many things that made his life easier on earth and saved his time and effort. Therefore, our grandmothers and mothers used the manual mincer and considered it at that time to be an amazing invention as they used to mince meat and beans with a mortar or a grinder that were common at that time. Thus, using the manual mincer at that time was considered great progress and I think that if the electric mincer had been invented at their time, they would have hastened to buy it. Therefore, why should we stick to an old invention that does not save time or effort?

“Is it because the husband likes to waste his wife’s time in something useless or has he other logical reasons like not having enough money to buy it? If this is the reason, he should have persuaded his wife gently to postpone purchasing it until he can afford it. Furthermore, using modern and safe inventions at home is something important as it saves time and effort for both the working woman and the housewife who should not spend all day in the kitchen in order to prepare lunch by using a manual mincer for instance. If she uses an electric mincer, she will save effort and time that she can use in doing more important things like looking after her children, educating them and teaching them the Quran. Also, she can have enough time to learn new things, read, learn matters pertaining to religion, attend religious lessons and other useful things.”

Ruqayyah said, “The contemporary Muslim, whether male or female, has important tasks that he should do. Thus, he should save his time and effort. If he is able to save the time and effort that he spends in his daily activities, why does he not do so by using modern equipment that helps him to achieve his aims and saves his time and effort in order to achieve what is more beneficial and important?”


Albaani : On Election Results – It’s Only The Faces That Change

Questioner: Our Shaikh, some Muslims observe the West and their advancements and when something happens there they display joy and happiness, is this regarded as a defect in ’aqidah related to actions or the heart? And what do you advise these people with?

imageAl-Albaani: I’m sorry, what do you mean … what do you mean by …

Interjection: Clinton, Shaikh.

Questioner: America’s Presidents, so and so went and so and so has come.

Al-Albaani: Ah.

Questioner: This one is better than that one, this one will benefit the Muslims and so on.

Al-Albaani: This is a weakness in both eemaan and intellect, a weakness of eemaan and intellect. The reality which every Muslim must bear in mind regarding such situations is His Saying تبارك وتعالى, “Every time a nation enters, it will curse its sister,” [A’raaf 7:38] so that they may taste the punishment.

Someone Else: The aayah, “… when they have all overtaken one another therein, the last of them will say about the first of them …” [A’raaf 7:38]

Al-Albaani: Allaahu Akbar. Yes, so the point is that in reality this joy is a childish one, not that of men, firstly, and secondly, not that of believing men. [That one becomes joyful] because Bush lost and in his place came …

Questioner: Clinton.

Al-Albaani: I don’t know what his name is.

Questioner: [Laughs]

Al-Albaani: Names that are strange to me.

Questioner: By Allaah, O Shaikh of ours, the names of devils.

Al-Albaani: [Laughs] so the point is … Bush lost and so and so won the elections–all of them follow the same policy, it is only the faces that change.

For this reason it is silliness to become happy because Bush has gone and so and so has taken his place, even more so when we don’t yet know so and so’s [the new leader’s] good from his evil, if there is good in them. So why this haste? As long as disbelief is one community, and the politics of the American population as a people is with the Jews, so the fact that Bush lost and so and so won does not change the politics of this populace in such a speedy manner which some of those of weak minds and intellects imagine, [imagining to themselves] that we are rid of Bush [and this new leader will be better] … ok, maybe this [new leader] is worse than Bush.

Whatever the case, a Muslim does not become joyful when a disbeliever loses and another disbeliever takes his place, because disbelief is one millah, and their politics is one and the same. Look at … who was it in the ministry of the Jews and someone else took his place …

Questioner: Yitzhak Shamir and Yitzhak Rabin.

Al-Albaani: Yitzak Rabin, what did we see between this one falling and that one taking his place? Nothing whatsoever. It is just a game they play with the minds of those of weak intellects and unfortunately with some Muslims or politicians who did not lead according to the politics of the Quraan and the Sunnah.

So because of that I am able to say concerning this that Allaah … as He عز وجل said … “Indeed, Allaah does not like the exultant.” [Qasas 28:76], these people who become joyful at the downfall of this person and the success [in becoming leader] of that one, these people are as I just said … their intellects are like those of children, rather, sparrows.

And Allaah’s aid is sought.

Questioner: Does this issue have a connection to aqidah, i.e., is it possible to call … i.e., some of our brothers call those who display such joy for those people disbelievers?

Al-Albaani: No, no, all of that is a mistake and disobedience, if it has a connection to disbelief then it is to disbelief in action. Yaa akhi, we go by the principle and relax [which is that] the disbelief which takes one out of the religion is that connected to the heart, not the tongue. This question of yours reminds me of another just way of categorising disbelief, so there is disbelief in word [kufr lafdhee] and disbelief of the heart [kufr qalbee], the previous categorization was disbelief in creed [kufr I’tiqaadi] and disbelief in action [kufr amalee].

Now another just way of categorising disbelief is disbelief in word and disbelief of the heart, the disbelief of the heart is the equivalent of disbelief in action, and disbelief in word equates to disbelief in action.

So a person who displays joy at the loss of Bush and the success of George or Antonius or whoever, there is no doubt that such joy should not emanate from a Muslim, so it is possible for us to term this as disbelief in word, but such a person is not declared a disbeliever based on it, because it happened in the time the Prophet عليه السلام, [an incident] I’m sure some of which will not be hidden from any of you, like the hadith of Ibn Abbaas when he said that the Prophet عليه السلام gave a sermon to his Companions one day and a man then stood up and said to him, “As Allah and you, will,” so he said, “Would you set me up as a partner beside Allaah? Say, ‘As Allaah, Alone Wills.’”

So this is disbelief in word, he said to him, “Would you set me up as a partner beside Allaah?” but he did not impose upon him any of the requisites of disbelief in creed [kufr I’tiqaadi].

So we should always keep this correct categorization before our eyes: disbelief in creed or the heart [is the first], and disbelief in action or in word [the second], because uttering a word is an action, so when we see a thing such as this we do not rush to say, ‘A disbeliever,’ even if he uttered a word of disbelief we do not rush to declare him to be a disbeliever and to remove him from the religion until we clarify what he meant by that statement.

Interjection: With your permission, O Shaikh of ours, if I could please …

Al-Albaani: Tafaddal …

Al-Hudaa wan-Noor, 672. [1/5/708].


Start with yourself before others

In Da'wah (call to Islam), start with yourself before the members of your family and other people and look at what is lacking in you in order that you may start treating it.

imageSo if there is a common deficiency between you and one of your companions or family members, then join him with you in resolving this problem because the Messenger of Allaah sallallaahu alaihi wa sallam said: "Whoever from amongst you sees an evil he should change it with his hand and if he is not able to, then with his tongue and if he is not able to, then he should hate it in his heart, and that is the weakest level of faith." [Muslim and Ahmed]

How is your relationship with Allaah?

How is your humbleness in prayer?

Read about that which will better your condition and that of your prayer, increase your humbleness in it and soften your heart.

Are you one whose supplications are answered or do you notice most of your supplications not being answered?

Look into your Aqeedah (Faith) and the level of your certainty and reliance upon Allaah, and observe closely your food and drink - are they from that which is Halaal (lawful) or Haraam (unlawful), or is there some doubt about their source?

If the situation was one that requires enjoining good and forbidding evil, what would you do? Prophet Muhammad, sallallaahu alaihi wa sallam said: "By Him in Who's Hand is my soul, you will enjoin good and prohibit evil or (else) Allaah will soon send upon you a punishment from Him, then you will call upon Him and He will not answer you." [Ahmed and At-Tirmithi]

Maybe you would benefit from reading Hadeeths (Prophetic narrations) pertaining to the punishment of the grave and that of its bliss, about the terror of the Resurrection, and the torment of the Hell Fire. You could well continue reading for days, weeks or months, accompanying that with good actions and self-struggle.

It is imperative that a person takes his soul to account and treats his deficiencies. Match yourself against the Quran and the Sunnah (Prophet's, sallallaahu alaihi wa sallam, tradition) to know who you are, and look what you have set aside for Allaah to know what Allaah, the Almighty and Majestic, has prepared for you because of the saying of the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu alaihi wa sallam: "Whoever wants to know what Allaah has prepared for him then he should look to what he has prepared for Allaah." [As-Silsilah As-Saheehah]

Are you prepared for the meeting with Allaah?

Have you fulfilled the rights of the creation, one to another? Or are you in a constant state of postponing and deferring?

Have you converted your knowledge of repentance into crying and penitence?

Have you turned whatever you have read about loving Allaah into real love for your Muslim brothers?

Do you often visit them, and overlook their faults? Do you aid the needy from amongst them, feel delight for their happiness and grieve for their sorrow?

Do you taste the sweetness and delight of Faith?

Are Allaah and his Messenger, sallallaahu alaihi wa sallam, more beloved to you than anybody else?

Do you give precedence to the love of Allaah over wealth, business, whims and desires?

Test yourself when you hear the call to prayer, if you notice a desire to delay answering it in order to pursue your interests in trade (for example) then know that Satan has succeeded in gradually leading you astray and that your love for Allaah is deficient. In this way it is upon you to consolidate yourself, giving precedence to the orders of Allaah over any other worldly matter.

How is your abhorrence of entering into disbelief? Do you abhor it as you would abhor being thrown into the Hell Fire?

Do you live this abhorrence and this feeling in you, so that your sincerity to Allaah is cultivated and that you may hasten to purify your soul?

Contemplate the Hadeeth of Umm Salamah may Allaah be pleased with her who said: '"Most of the invocations of the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu alaihi wa sallam, used to be: "O Changer of the Hearts make my heart firm upon your religion." [Ahmed and At-Tirmithi]

Reflect upon how Ibraaheem (Abraham) may Allaah exalt his mention feared associating partners with Allaah, so he used to supplicate (what means): "And keep me and my sons away from worshipping idols." [Quran 14:35]

This is what Abu Ad-Dardaa' may Allaah be pleased with him used to fear hence his saying: 'Verily what I fear from my Lord on the Day of Resurrection is that He calls me in front of all creation and says to me "O 'Uwaymir (i.e., Abu Ad-Dardaa' himself)," so I say, "Here I am My Lord at Your service," so He says, "What did you act upon from the knowledge that you acquired?"

Don't forget the supplication of Yousuf (Joseph) may Allaah exalt his mention (which means): "Cause me to die as a Muslim and join me with the righteous." [Quran 12:101]

You should aid yourself through fear: living with the fear of eternal abode in the Hell Fire. Don't rest and sit around while the sweetness of Faith is missing or is weakened. How many people set out on journeys for the purpose of treating their illnesses and how many of them spend out of their wealth to treat these illnesses? Do not the souls and the hearts have more priority in being treated, as their matter is one of total eternity? Bring to mind the Hadeeth, "Every slave will be resurrected upon that which he died." [Muslim], then expect death at any moment.

It is better for you if you were to meet death whilst trying to improve your own condition than to die whilst striving to improve others', being held accountable at the same time for leaving off obligatory actions just like the lantern that burns itself out and gives light to others, as in the Hadeeth: "The example of the scholar who teaches the people good things but forgets himself is that of a lantern, it gives light to the people but burns itself out." [At-Tabaraani]

By: Sheikh Husayn al-Awaaishah


Sunday, September 22, 2013

The most important characteristics for which a woman should choose a suitor….

Shaykh Muhammad ibn Salih al-‘Uthaymeen (rahimahullah) said:

imageThe most important characteristics for which a woman should choose a suitor are good character and religious commitment. Wealth and good lineage are secondary matters. The most important thing is that the suitor should be religiously committed and of good character, because the woman will not lose anything with a husband who is religiously committed and of good character. If he keeps her, he will keep her on reasonable terms and if he divorces her he will release her with kindness. Moreover the one who is religiously committed and of good character will be a blessing for her and her children, and she will learn good attitudes and religion from him. But if he is not like that, then she should keep away from him, especially some of those who are negligent about performing prayers or who are known to drink alcohol – Allah forbid.

As for those who do not pray at all, they are kuffar and it is not permissible for them to marry believing women, and they are not permissible for (believing women) either. What matters is that the believing woman should focus on good character and religious commitment. As for good lineage, if that is present too, then it is better, because the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “If there comes to you one with whose religious commitment and character you are pleased, then give (your daughter or female relative under your care) in marriage to him.”

But if they are socially compatible, that is better.

[Fatawa al-Mar’ah al-Muslimah (2/702)]


The Rights of the Muslim Wife

The rights of the wife which are hers alone:

imageThe wife has financial rights over her husband, which are the mahr (dowry), spending and accommodation.

And she has non-financial rights, such as fair division between co-wives, being treated in a decent and reasonable manner, and not being treated in a harmful way by her husband.

1. Financial rights

(a) The mahr (dowry). This is the money to which the wife is entitled from her husband when the marriage contract is completed or when the marriage is consummated. It is a right which the man is obliged to pay to the woman. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And give to the women (whom you marry) their Mahr (obligatory bridal-money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage) with a good heart” [an-Nisa’ 4:4]

The prescription of the mahr demonstrates the seriousness and importance of the marriage-contract, and is a token of respect and honour to the woman.

The mahr is not a condition or essential part of the marriage-contract, according to the majority of fuqahaa’; rather it is one of the consequences of the contract. If the marriage-contract is done without any mention of the mahr, it is still valid, according to the consensus of the majority, because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“There is no sin on you, if you divorce women while yet you have not touched (had sexual relation with) them, nor appointed unto them their Mahr (bridal-money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage)” [al-Baqarah 2:236]

The fact that divorce is permitted before consummation of the marriage or before stipulating the mahr indicates that it is permissible not to stipulate the mahr in the marriage-contract.

If the mahr is stipulated, it becomes obligatory upon the husband; if it is not stipulated, then he must give the mahr that is given to women of similar status to his wife.

(b) Spending. The scholars of Islam are agreed that it is obligatory for husbands to spend on their wives, on the condition that the wife make herself available to her husband. If she refuses him or rebels, then she is not entitled to that spending.

The reason why it is obligatory to spend on her is that the woman is available only to her husband, because of the marriage contract, and she is not allowed to leave the marital home except with his permission. So he has to spend on her and provide for her, and this is in return for her making herself available to him for his pleasure.

What is meant by spending is providing what the wife needs of food and accommodation. She has the right to these things even if she is rich, because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“but the father of the child shall bear the cost of the mother’s food and clothing on a reasonable basis” [al-Baqarah 2:233]

“Let the rich man spend according to his means; and the man whose resources are restricted, let him spend according to what Allah has given him” [al-Talaq 65:7]

From the Sunnah:

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said to Hind bint ‘Utbah – the wife of Abu Sufyaan – who had complained that he did not spend on her: “Take what is sufficient for you and your children, on a reasonable basis.”

It was narrated that ‘Aa’ishah said: “Hind bint ‘Utbah, the wife of Abu Sufyaan, entered upon the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and said, ‘O Messenger of Allah, Abu Sufyaan is a stingy man who does not spend enough on me and my children, except for what I take from his wealth without his knowledge. Is there any sin on me for doing that?’ The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, ‘Take from his wealth on a reasonable basis, only what is sufficient for you and your children.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 5049; Muslim, 1714)

It was narrated from Jaabir that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said in his Farewell Sermon:

“Fear Allah concerning women! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allah, and intercourse with them has been made lawful unto you by words of Allah. You too have rights over them, and that they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed [i.e., not let them into the house] whom you do not like. But if they do that, you can chastise them but not severely. Their rights upon you are that you should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting manner” (Narrated by Muslim, 1218)

(c) Accommodation. This is also one of the wife’s rights, which means that her husband should prepare for her accommodation according to his means and ability. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Lodge them (the divorced women) where you dwell, according to your means” [al-Talaq 65:6]

2. Non-financial rights

(i) Fair treatment of co-wives. One of the rights that a wife has over her husband is that she and her co-wives should be treated equally, if the husband has other wives, with regard to nights spent with them, spending and clothing.

(ii) Kind treatment. The husband must have a good attitude towards his wife and be kind to her, and offer her everything that may soften her heart towards him, because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“and live with them honourably” [an-Nisa’ 4:19]

“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable” [al-Baqarah 2:228]

From the Sunnah:

It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: “The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: ‘Be kind to women.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 3153; Muslim, 1468).

There follow examples of the kind treatment of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) towards his wives – for he is the best example:

1. It was narrated from Zaynab bint Abi Salamah that Umm Salamah said: “I got my menses when I was lying with the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) under a single woolen sheet. I slipped away and put on the clothes I usually wore for menstruation. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said to me, ‘Have you got your menses?’ I said, ‘Yes.’ Then he called me and made me lie with him under the same sheet.”

She said: And she told me that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to kiss her when he was fasting, and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and I used to do ghusl to cleanse ourselves from janaabah from one vessel. (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 316; Muslim, 296)

2. It was narrated that ‘Urwah ibn al-Zubayr said: “ ‘Aa’ishah said: ‘By Allah, I saw the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) standing at the door of my apartment when the Abyssinians were playing with their spears in the Mosque of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him). He covered me with his cloak so that I could watch their games, then he stood there for my sake until I was the one who had had enough. So you should appreciate the fact that young girls like to have fun.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 443; Muslim, 892)

3. It was narrated from ‘Aa’ishah the Mother of the Believers (may Allah be pleased with her) that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to pray sitting down; he would recite Qur’an when he was sitting down, then when there were thirty or forty ayahs left, he would stand up and recite them standing up. Then he did rukoo’, then sujood; then he would do likewise in the second rak’ah. When he had finished his prayer, he would look, and if I was awake he would talk with me, and if I was asleep he would lie down. (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 1068)

(iii) Not harming one’s wife.

This is one of the basic principles of Islam. Because harming others is haraam in the case of strangers, it is even more so in the case of harming one’s wife.

It was narrated from ‘Ubaadah ibn al-Saamit that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) ruled, “There should be no harming nor reciprocating harm.” (Narrated by Ibn Majah,, 2340)

This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by Imam Ahmad, al-Hakim, Ibn al-Salaah and others. See Khalaasat al-Badr al-Muneer, 2/438.

Among the things to which the Lawgiver drew attention in this matter is the prohibition of hitting or beating in a severe manner.

It was narrated from Jabir that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said in his Farewell Sermon:

“Fear Allah concerning women! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allah, and intercourse with them has been made lawful unto you by words of Allah. You too have rights over them, and that they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed [i.e., not let them into the house] whom you do not like. But if they do that, you can chastise them but not severely. Their rights upon you are that you should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting manner” (Narrated by Muslim, 1218)

by Shaykh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

The Rights of the Wife upon her Husband

The wife is naturally entitled for food, clothing, housing and other related items with expenses to be born by the husband. This natural right has been given by Allah, the almighty, to the wife based on the verse from the glorious Qur’an:

“The mothers shall give suck to their offspring for two whole years, if the father desires to complete the term. But he shall bear the cost of their food and clothing on equitable terms.” [al-Baqarah 2:233]

Moreover, Allah’s Apostle (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “(Wives) are entitled for food and clothing from their husbands in equitable terms.” Also the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was once asked: “What is the right of the wife unto her husband?” He (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “She is entitled for the same food you eat, offer her clothing whenever you buy yourself clothes, do not hit her on the face, do not insult her and do not abandon her unless you do so in the same house (under the same roof).“ This Hadeeth is reported by Abu Dawud.

Similarly , other rights to which the wife entitled is to be treated justly and fairly in case of multiple marriages. In such case the husband must be fair and just to both wives, treat them fairly in terms of expenditure, housing, time and all other items of which the husband is capable. Being biased or even inclined and preferring one wife over the other is considered one of the major sins in Islam in the sight of Allah, the Almighty. Allah’s Apostle (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “If a man married two wives and preferred one over the other, he will come on the Day of the Judgment with a distinctly slanted side of his body.” This Hadeeth is reported by Imam Ahmed and reporters of the book of Sunan.

Man, as the husband, however, will not held responsible or accountable for things that he has no control over, such as love, affection and self comfort. Allah, the Almighty stated in the glorious Qur’an:

“Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women , even if it is your ardent desire: But turn not away ( from a woman) altogether, so as to leave her ( as it were) hanging ( in the air). “ [an-Nisa' 4:129]

It is also reported that Allah’s Apostle (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to divide things amongst his wives fairly and equally, then saying: “O Allah! This is the fair distribution that I can do best in accordance to my abilities. O Allah! Please blame me not for what You own and I do not own (i.e. the acts of the heart in terms of love and affection).” This Hadeeth is reported by Abu Dawud, Tirmithi, Ibn Majah and Nasai’i.

However, if a husband preferred one wife over another in terms of spending the night with, based on the approval and acceptance of the other wife, then in such a case, there is no harm. That, in fact, was the case with ‘Aa’ishah and Sawdah, two of his wives, may Allah be pleased with them, when Sawdah agreed to grant her night to ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with them) toward the end of the life of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him). Yet , when the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) became very ill, he continuously asked: “ Where shall be tomorrow (i.e in whose house)?” All his wives agreed to let him stay at the house of ‘Aa’ishah where he wanted to be until his death (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him).” This Hadeeth was reported by both Bukhari and Muslim.


The Rights of the Muslim Husband

The rights of the husband over his wife are among the greatest rights; indeed his rights over her are greater than her rights over him, because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

image“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them” [al-Baqarah 2:228]

al-Jassaas said: Allah tells us in this ayah that each of the spouses has rights over the other, and that the husband has one particular right over his wife which she does not have over him.

Ibn al-‘Arabi said: this text states that he has some preference over her with regard to rights and duties of marriage.

These rights include:

(a) The obligation of obedience. Allah has made the man a qawwaam (protector and maintainer) of the woman by commanding, directing and taking care of her, just as guardians take care of their charges, by virtue of the physical and mental faculties that Allah has given only to men and the financial obligations that He has enjoined upon them. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means” [al-Nisa’ 4:34]

‘Ali ibn Abi Talhah said, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbas: “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women” means, they are in charge of them, i.e., she should obey him in matters of obedience that Allah has enjoined upon her, and obey him by treating his family well and taking care of his wealth. This was the view of Muqaatil, al-Saddi and al-Dahhaak. (Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 1/492)

(b) Making herself available to her husband. One of the rights that the husband has over his wife is that he should be able to enjoy her (physically). If he marries a woman and she is able to have intercourse, she is obliged to submit herself to him according to the contract, if he asks her. That is after he gives her the immediate mahr, and gives her some time – two or three days, if she asks for that – to sort herself out, because that is something that she needs, and because that is not too long and is customary.

If a wife refuses to respond to her husband’s request for intercourse, she has done something haraam and has committed a major sin, unless she has a valid shar’i excuse such as menses, obligatory fasting, sickness, etc.

It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: “The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: ‘When a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, and he went to sleep angry with her, the angels will curse her until morning.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 3065; Muslim, 1436)

(c) Not admitting anyone whom the husband dislikes. One of the rights that the husband has over his wife is that she should not permit anyone whom he dislikes to enter his house.

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “It is not permitted for a woman to fast when her husband is present without his permission, or to admit anyone into his house without his permission. And whatever she spends (in charity) of his wealth without his consent….” (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 4899; Muslim, 1026)

It was narrated from Sulayman ibn ‘Amr ibn al-Ahwas: my father told me that he was present at the Farewell Pilgrimage (Hujjat al-Wadaa’) with the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him). He [the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him)] praised and glorified Allah, then he preached a sermon and said: “Treat women kindly, for they are prisoners and you have no other power over them than that, if they are guilty of open lewdness, then refuse to share their beds, and hit them, but not severely. But if they return to obedience, (then) do not seek means (of annoyance) against them. You have rights over your women and your women have rights over you. Your rights over your women are that they should not let anyone whom you dislike sit on your bed and they should not let anyone whom you dislike enter your house. Their rights over you are that you should feed and clothe them well.”

(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1163 – he said this is a saheeh hasan hadeeth. Also narrated by Ibn Maajah, 1851)

It was narrated that Jaabir said: [the Prophet] (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:

“Fear Allah concerning women! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allah, and intercourse with them has been made lawful unto you by words of Allah. You too have rights over them, and that they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed [i.e., not let them into the house] whom you do not like. But if they do that, you can chastise them but not severely. Their rights upon you are that you should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting manner” (Narrated by Muslim, 1218)

(d) Not going out of the house except with the husband’s permission. One of the rights of the husband over his wife is that she should not go out of the house except with his permission.

The Shafa’is and Hanbalis said: she does not have the right to visit (even) her sick father except with the permission of her husband, and he has the right to prevent her from doing that….because obedience to the husband is obligatory, and it is not permitted to neglect an obligatory action for something that is not obligatory.

(e) Discipline. The husband has the right to discipline his wife if she disobeys him in something good, not if she disobeys him in something sinful, because Allah has enjoined disciplining women by forsaking them in bed and by hitting them, when they do not obey.

The Hanafis mentioned four situations in which a husband is permitted to discipline his wife by hitting her. These are: not adorning herself when he wants her to; not responding when he calls her to bed and she is taahirah (pure, i.e., not menstruating); not praying; and going out of the house without his permission.

The evidence that it is permissible to discipline one’s wife includes the ayahs (interpretation of the meaning):

“As to those women on whose part you see ill‑conduct, admonish them (first), (next) refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful)” [al-Nisa’ 4:34]

“O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones” [al-Tahreem 66:6]

Ibn Katheer said:

Qutaadah said: you should command them to obey Allah, and forbid them to disobey Allah; you should be in charge of them in accordance with the command of Allah, and instruct them to follow the commands of Allah, and help them to do so. If you see any act of disobedience towards Allah, then stop them from doing it and rebuke them for that.

This was also the view of al-Dahhaak and Muqaatil: that the duty of the Muslim is to teach his family, including his relatives and his slaves, that which Allah has enjoined upon them and that which He has forbidden them. (Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 4/392)

(f) The wife serving her husband. There is a great deal of evidence (daleel) for this, some of which has been mentioned above.

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said:

She is obliged to serve her husband according to what is reasonable among people of similar standing. That varies according to circumstances: the way in which a Bedouin woman serves (her husband) will not be like the way of a town-dweller, and the way of a strong woman will not be like the way of a weak woman. (al-Fataawa al-Kubraa, 4/561)

(g) Submitting herself to him. Once the conditions of the marriage-contract have been fulfilled and it is valid, then the woman is obliged to submit herself to her husband and allow him to enjoy her (physically), because once the contract is completed, he is allowed in return to enjoy her, and the wife is entitled to the compensation which is the mahr.

(h) The wife should treat her husband in a good manner, because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable” [al-Baqarah 2:228]

Al-Qurtubi said:

It was also narrated from him – i.e., Ibn ‘Abbas – that this means: they have the right to good companionship and kind and reasonable treatment from their husbands just as they are obliged to obey the commands of their husbands.

And it was said that they have the right that their husbands should not harm them, and their husbands have a similar right over them. This was the view of al-Tabari.

Ibn Zayd said: You should fear Allah concerning them just as they should fear Allah concerning you.

The meanings are similar, and the ayah includes all of that in the rights and duties of marriage. (Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 3/123-124)

And Allah knows best.

Shaykh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

Responsibilities of the Wife to Her Husband and Family

1. Obedience

Husain ibn Muhsin narrated: My aunt narrated to me that she said, “I came to the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and he said, ‘Are you married?’ I said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘How are you with respect to him?’ She said, ‘I do not fail him in anything except for what I am not able to do.’ He said, ‘See how you are with respect to him for he is your Paradise or your Hell-Fire.’” Recorded by al-Nasa’i in Ishrah al-Nisa’, pp. 1067-109.

Abu Hurayrah narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, “If the woman prayed her five daily prayers, guarded her chastity and obeyed her husband, she will enter Paradise through any gate she wills.” Recorded by ibn Hibbaan in his Saheeh, 4163, The Book of Marriage.

The woman must obey what her husband says, but only if things are good and acceptable. If it is something forbidden, she has every right to object to it and she MUST refuse to obey him.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) has said, “There is no obeisance in what is an act of disobedience to Allah. Obedience is only with respect to what is good and acceptable (maroof).” Recorded by al-Bukhari, 4340, Book on Military Expeditions

2. Remaining in the House and Not Going out Except with the Husband’s Permission

“And stay in your houses and do not display yourselves like that during the times of Ignorance.” [al-Ahzab 33:33]

Allah (Subhanahu wa ta’ala) has ordered the wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and the women in general to stay in their houses as a means of protection. It is also a way of guarding the rights of their husbands.

Shaykh al-Islam ibn Taimiyyah stated, “It is not allowed for a wife to leave her house except by the permission of her husband. It is not allowed for anyone to take her from him or to prevent her from going to him, even if she be a nursing mother, midwife, or of any other type of occupation. If she leaves the house of her husband without his permission, she is being recalcitrant (naashizah), and disobedient to Allah and His Messenger and deserving of punishment.” Majmoo al-Fatawaa, vol. 32, p. 281

As a note: Although in ahadith and Qur’an states that if a woman asks to go to the masjid, she should not be refused that right as long as she does not have any prior obligations to the household (and yes, we know that it is better for the woman to stay at home and make salah there). However, in due respect to the husband, please ask his permission as a means of gaining trust and respect with each other. Allahu alim.

3. Responding to His Call When He Calls Her to His Bed

It is obligatory upon her to respond without delay, even if she does need to have sexual intercourse.

“By the One in whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, a woman does not fulfill the rights of her Lord until she fulfills the rights of her husband. Even if he calls her [to have sexual intercourse with her] while she is on a camel’s saddle, she does not refuse him.” Ahmad, vol. 4, p. 381

If she refuses, the angels will curse her until morning. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, “If a woman spends the night boycotting the bed of her husband, the angels curse her until the morning.” al-Bukhari in his Saheeh, 5194, Book on Marriage.

It was brought up during the halaqa “What if the woman is sick, does she still need to go to her husband and ‘do it?’” As stated earlier, it is obligatory. If he knows she is sick, may Allah (Subhanahu wa ta’ala) have mercy on her and make him understanding.

Also, if she is menstruating or just had a baby, she has the right to refuse sexual intercourse because her blood is considered najis (impure). Post-partum bleeding is a waiting period of about 40 days (or so).

During Ramadan, she has a right to refuse sexual intercourse with him during the day and the fasting period because Ramadan is a time to stay away from urges (eating, drinking, smoking, sexual desires, etc.).

4. Not Allowing Anyone to Enter His House Except with His Permission

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, “And your right upon them is that they do not allow anyone whom you dislike to sit on your cushion.” Muslim, Saheeh, 1218, Book on the Pilgrimage.

According to al-Nawawi, if the husband does not like the non-relative, if the person is a woman, or one of the wife’s relatives, regardless of the husband’s relationship to them, he may refuse them to enter the home. The wife cannot let any man, woman, relative or otherwise to enter the home unless she knows that the husband does not dislike that person. Sharh Saheeh Muslim.

If the woman knows that her husband is okay with the person, there is no harm from inviting them in, according to al-Nawawi, Fath al-Baari, vol. 8, p. 296.

5. Serving the Husband

She must serve him in bringing up the children, preparing the food, taking care of the clothes, etc.

It is narrated from Asmaa bint Abu Bakr al-Siddeeq that she said, “I used to serve al-Zubair ibn al-Awwaam – her husband – concerning all of the matters within the house. He used to have a horse that I used to take care of and give it its fodder. I would feed the horse and draw water for it.” She would also sew the water bucket and prepare the dough. She used to carry the dates upon her head from [al-Zubair’s] land which was about two miles away from her house. Saheeh al-Bukhari 5224, Saheeh Muslim 2182.

The husband is not free from all of the house hold chores. It is better if the husband can assist his wife when she needs his service. It shows good character of the husband and is also due in part with dealing with his wife in a kind and good manner.

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) performed some chores in order to help his wives. ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) said, when she was asked about what the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to do in the house, “He would help his wife – meaning serve his wife – but when the time for prayer came, he would leave to the prayer.” al-Bukhari, 676, Book on the Call to Prayer.

6. Protecting His Honour, Children, and Wealth

The wife must protect her chastity and be careful about hurting the honour and her reputation of not only herself, but her family as well.

She should not do anything lacking in religiousness or modesty. She should be careful about displaying her beauty to anyone other than those who can see her.

She should protect her husband with respect by raising the children in a good way and teaching them good characteristics and manners.

She should not be a spend thrift. She should only buy what is needed, not what is wanted.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) praised the women of the Quraish. He said about them, “They are the most merciful (ahnaah) to the child when he is young and the most tending to the husband with respect to what he owns.” al-Bukhari, 5082, Book on Marriage.

7. Being Thankful to the Husband, Not Denying His Virtues, and Treating Him in a Good Manner

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “I was shown the Hell-fire and that the majority of its dwellers were women who were ungrateful.” It was asked,“Do they disbelieve in Allah (or are they ungrateful to Allah?)” He replied, “They are ungrateful to their husbands and are ungrateful for the favours and the good (charitable deeds) done to them. If you have always been good (benevolent) to one of them and then she sees something in you (not of her liking), she will say, ‘I have never received any good from you.” Bukhari, Book 1, Volume 2, Hadeeth 28.

Not only is being ungrateful to your husband a disgrace, but it is a huge sign of disrespect and disobedience to the one who is supporting and providing the family.

May Allah (Subhanahu wa ta’ala) make us all pious and generous women to our (future) husband.



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